Aap Chutiye Hain

Lets be polite. Respect is a four letter word. Often you think you have something incredibly important to say. But what escapes your mouth is a loud fart. Speaking of farts, opinions are much like farts. The louder the fart the less meaningful value, density or concentration of its contents, as discernible by scent. The quieter the fart, the more incisive and poignant its content. I think a metaphor just died somewhere.

So calm down. Don't just vomit words to fill up voids in time. Say things simply. Don't cup my ears with your stupid foghorns.

Once, when I was in the army, I was yelled at by my commanding officer when I asked directions to the washroom. It was a bit later that I realised that he was simply answering my question at a decibel level he was used to, just in case there was an enemy helicopter overhead while I wanted to go pee. Well, in the end it did not matter much since by the time he was done giving me directions I didn't need to go anymore. Nevertheless, wet underpants did serve me well by keeping my nether regions a little cooler than the rest of the body for the day, as is generally recommended.

I don't know what point I'm trying to make. But, I'm sure there is one somewhere in here if you are willing to look hard enough.

Best.